Dr. Knowledgeable by Crimethink
Dr. Knowledgeable by Crimethink
Well, hello ladies and jerks. Its time for Mist Hunters all new
advice column....
DR. KNOWLEDGABLE
DK:Lets take a caller... Hello, your talking to Dr. Knowledgable. Whats
the glitch?
RM:Uh, hi. Its Radman.
DK:Whaddya need lamer?
RM:Well, I think that I have a sort of image problem.
DK:You cmae up with that one by yourself?
RM:Well, I think that people think that I take to much credit for ACID.
DK:Weel, you dont do to mu... Yeah, they think that.
RM:Well, I mean, cmon, Im the one that keeps all the group together! Who
collects the pack material? ME! Not Lord Jazz or Halster me!!!!! Any
advice?
DK: snore Ohh, umm, yes, I have some advice. You need to go outside and
take a real good look at things. You should realize that there are other
people in.....clickHello? Hello?
NO CARRIER
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....
DK:How about another caller? Hello, Heartbreak, what up?
HB:Im having problems with my, well, my...you know...uhhh...unitclick
NO CARRIER
DK:Next caller... Whats the deal Ln?
LN:Its with Rhett.
DK:Is he afraid to talk about his problem?
LN:Yes, he cant even admit that he has a problem.
DK:Well, you tell me what it is and you can then get Rhett on the phone.
LN:Well, he keeps leaving sores around my...clickNO CARRIER
DK:Isnt someone screening these callers? Whats that? The screeeneer
commited suicide? Yeah, thats right Whaddya expect in a therapists
office... Next caller who is this?
B5:Yeah, this is the Black Snowman..
DK:Let me put you...hee hee... on ho...hee hee... hold.
B5:Okay.click
DK:Hahahahahahahahahaha! Someone get the tape recorder running! Why?
Cuz we got the Black Snowman on! Big time rip artist.click
DK:Go ahead with your problem Im listening...hee.
B5:Well, uhh, this is all confidential, right?
DK:We got the tape UHHHH........... YES IT IS!
B5:Well, I kind of have a problem with ripping ansi.
DK:We kind of caught on to that one.
B5:I mean my ansi sucks real bad so I try to compensate.
DK:Is there anything that you could be compensating for? Childhood probs?
Dating stress?
B5:Well... There was that one time when I was over in Europe and I was
checking out Paris.
DK:What about it?
B5:I ordered a hooker and it turned out to be a guy.
DK:HAHAHAHuuuuuummmmm, go ahead, I had to make a mental note.
B5:I went through with it.
DK:You fucking homo! Get the .... continue ..hee hee... please.
B5:Then there was the time that LN and I got together and....CLICK
NO CARRIER
Well that is all the time that we have for this week. Next time we
should be sporting Boba Fett, the operator of the guy that runs Acidic and
maybe even a special mystery caller. Once again I came through with more
great lit. Tell Bf that you guys want a li. dept. with Mist Hunter in
control!!