lemmings phorce
-- lets get right on down to it. -----------------------------------------
damn, thats a stupid title, but it was all i could think of. oh well.. ill
have to go with it.
-- lemmings ---------------------------------------------------------------
theyre great animals, granted, but theyre an even greater computer game.
i mean, look at them! they just parade around, and jump off cliffs! how
stupid can you get? theyre just great to watch.. those little stupid guys,
running around like idiots.. and i just got the lemmings CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
released in 1992! this is GREAT! im addicted to it!
-- what about 3-d? --------------------------------------------------------
yeah, they just realeased that 3-d lemmings CRAP, but its NOTHING compared
to the good old, 2-d, grainy, ORIGINAL lemmings. hell, that tinny adlib
music brings back memories.. and even the days BEFORE they had sound at all!
i used to think that those neat sounds that came out of the pc speaker was
COOL! it was great! i still own my old sierra games, in the original EGA
baby! i was first on my block to get an EGA monitor, so, obviously, i never
needed to upgrade until just a YEAR ago! who needs 80486, get an 8088!
-- wow, back in da day.. sniff ------------------------------------------
exactly my point. back in da day when i used to play gwbasic games all day
and read 3-2-1 contacts BASIC Training section. dont laugh, i know you
did too, and if you didnt, DAMN YOU. you shouldnt be reading this anyway.
-- pix? -------------------------------------------------------------------
ever look at one of those were trying to make an ansi look
like a newspaper things? i always thought that the little
anecdotal pictures were neat, especially with those captions
lemmie try one now.. wow, that took me a long time.. especial-
ly since i was in dos edit and i dont know my ascii codes by
heart. mmmm.. i dont think that looks much like a duck, oh
well, the captionll have to do. ack. basically what im typ-
ing right now is just filler so that i can surround the lil duck in heat
drawing ive got right here.. isnt this great, folks? no
other zinell give you ready-for-newsprint quality like y0lk does. it seems
ive surrounded my little drawing. is it just me, or does that little duck
look uglier and uglier every time you look at it? im not too good at art..
oh well. lemmie end this line up and everything will be done. steaptitude.
-- steaptitude? -----------------------------------------------------------
yeah, i needed to end the line perfectly, and that was the only word i could
think of. oh well.
-- rebuttal ---------------------------------------------------------------
im 5 10, and im 115 pounds or so. i think thats good. and i never said
hooch was short - at least not in my last article.
-- chinese art films with subtitles ---------------------------------------
yeah, these things are GREAT. for the past year or so, ive been mining the
movies for rental at the library for those so-cool chinese art films. these
things are the shit, man.. they all end depressingly, and they all have a lot
of those yellow subtitles. i mean, NO WORDS in english. this isnt good for
me, since i dont speak chinese, but these movies are great. one movie was
about this peasant woman in mainland china who had a husband that was kicked
in the nuts by the village leader-guy. she couldnt do anything about it,
but she wanted an apology from the villager leader-guy. he wouldnt, so she
decides to go to a higher court. basically, the whole movie is the journey
this woman and her daughter take, trying to find justice for her husband who
isnt really hurt, except for a bit of pain the first day. she goes to the
big city, and takes her first ride in a car, and all these people in suits
are all running around her in the city, and she is completely lost. finally,
she gets to talk to someone about her husband 3/4 of the movie in and at
the end, the village chief gets sent to jail. the woman is sad because all
she wanted was an apology, and the village chief was actually a nice guy
after all. and now that ive told you the movie, go see it.. great stuff,
truly. its named something like the story of cho ju or something.. i
cant remember.. but all of these chinese films are great. go seeem.
-- piss like a what? ------------------------------------------------------
what the hell does that mean? piss like a racehorse. ive personally
never been near a racehorse, and this bothers me. how do racehorses piss
more than other horses? is the force of their pissing very strong? do they
piss only once a week? i dont get it.. someone, explain this to me...
this is a question that has been bothering me for weeks.
-- leprosy ----------------------------------------------------------------
best scene from robin hood, the friar to azim, disguised as a leper:
is this your finger?
-- in closing.. -----------------------------------------------------------
touching the light socket caused my finger to involuntarily shake until i
pulled back my hand, for a grand total of 0.5 seconds.
-- peace out, yo ----------------------------------------------------------
greetz: all those big zines guys that write better than me.. and mogel, whom
i dont know, but said hi to me when i went into zines,
even tho im HARDLY on irc, and ive never met him b4... i
think it might have been someone else or something.. or a
script that says hi to everyone who enters a room. oh well.
if you read this far, you mustve had SOME interest in this.. email me..
please. im desparate, and im starting to doubt that ANYONE reads this shit
anyway..
email me at: phorce@aim.novasys.com - i hope that workz, i need to pay..
-- editorz notez ---------------------------------------------------------
phorce@aim.novasys.com will not work if you dont pay
mail creed@novasys.com if you want to contact y0lk. hmm, that lemmings game
rools. i have the christmas special to. and mogel... HES MOGEL!*!@!
GET A GRIP, MAN!??!?!?!*!*!*!*
-- yak, i mean sheep-herderz notez ---------------------------------------
put an ever-lovin spoonful of your all-time sheep-herdin action right here,
baby. right here.
-- index ------------------------------------------------------------------
index of y0lk issues:
issue . title
001 the other white meat
002 several k-rad elite haxors sitting around a campfire and grooving
003 nuclear weapons, global destruction, op wars.
004 a young man, an infant, a yak... all living in sin
005 household uses for afghanistanian food
006 pour cement down my anus
007 hail santa!
008 hasidism and sysops - a pair for the nineties?
009 lunchables rock.
010 t-shirts and toejam
011 nap-time - the dog prank - exclusive interview
012 movie reviews showgirls!@ - win95 vs. os/2 sorta
013 straight outta compton - dialchix - muh dawg!@
014 im a tall, goofy, dorky, chink
015 y0lk: bedazzled by the eliteness
016 how to blow your nuts out with cornstarch and orangina
017 i am a warez pup - who are you?
. 018 , lemmings ,
issues 1-5, 7, 9, and 15-16 by creed
issues 6, 8, 11-13, and 17 by hooch
issue 10 by bEdlAM
issue 14 and 18 by phorce
note: if you have written an issue, you are a y0lk member, have a y0lk member
board, etc. woo.