team
la
zarus
presents:
a little something we like to call: the colours do
nt quite match
a blender30 entry
in a galaxy far far away so far away th
at we cant even see it , there
lived a mutant cubicle named arthur.
this isnt his story.
why? because the three words werent about him, thats
why.
the real story takes us to a monestery in northern tibe
t, where lazarussian
kung-fu monks are in the middle of a secret conference.
warpus: so, i put this where?
rusted: there, in that hole.
warpus: this hole?
rusted: yeah, you just need to push it in a b
it harder.
5 second wait
warpus: its not going in.
samurai: let me try.
5 second wait
samurai to rusted: are you SURE its that h
ole? because it doesnt fit.
rusted: of course its that hole! ive done
it bef-
but before he could finish, the door slowly opened, and
a extremely tired
dislogic entered the room.
dislogic: heil stalin!
everyone else: heil stain!
dislogic: i have good news, and i have bad ne
ws.
rusted: bad news first.
dislogic: allright. well, i followed some ni
njas home, and guess where they
lead me to.
warpus: a secret underground military base eq
uipped with nuclear, biological
and chemical weapons, enough dynamite to blow
up argentina, and an
army big enough to start the third world war?
dislogic: well, no.. not really... just a s
weat shop.
warpus: oh
samurai: whats the good news?
dislogic: the ninjas didnt lead me to an und
erground military base equipped
with nuclear, biological, and chemi
cal weapons, enough dynamite to
blow up argentina, and an army big
enough to start the third world
war.
warpus: .. phew.. .
dislogic: anyways, listen to this: the ninjas
are using child labour to
build extremely advanced vibrators.
this must be stopped at
once.
samurai: why?
dislogic: because child labour is bad.
samurai: oh yeah
warpus: so like, we need some sort of a plan.
so that we can.. you know..
win.
rusted: i suggest we use our elite kung fu fi
ghting skills to kick some
serious ninja ass.
watOr: can i help too?
samurai: sure thing
our five heroes then made their way to the extremely se
cret ninja sweatshop.
shorty before they reached their target, warpus turned
around towards his
companions, pulled out a portable podium out of his poc
ket, inflated it,
and started to speak:
my fellow lazarussians. THIS IS THE DAY WE CELEBRATE
OUR INDEPENDENCE DAY!
rusted: thats it?
samurai: man, that sucked.
watOr: i think he stole it from a movie.
warpus: enough! now, we fight. get your war
shouts ready. on three?
dislogic: in decimal?
warpus: uhmm.. umm.. yeah.. i guess so
dislogic: cant we do it in binary? we ALWAY
S do it in decimal
warpus: uhh.. sure, if nobody objects.
warpus looks around
warpus: guess not. here goes nothing
warpus: ONE!
warpus: ONE ZERO!
warpus: ONE ONE!
samurai: LONG LIVE THE MOTHERLAND!@*
warpus: BILL CLINTON IS BAD@*@!
watOr: GLASS IS MADE FROM MOLTEN SAND@*@!
rusted: REMEMBER NOVOGRAD!!**
dislogic: LET US KICK SOME ASS, FELLOW COMRAD
ES@**
with these words in their mouths the monks charged the
sweatshop. the rest
as they say, is history.
and here, a scene from the glorious battle wh
ich took place afterwards. it
was truly a magnificent display of bravery,
honour, and all the other stuff
that is usually displayed in battles de
finiately not inuit pottery .
K
MART
SWEAT
SHOP
oh no,eeee-yawww!
you kick
d
me
i
tibet
smi
shit my camera fucked
up
and thats pretty much all we have. let me explain how
this extremely
interesting artwork came to be:
1 samurai drew the pic
2 watOr shaded the pic
3 i warpus added things of my own to the pi
c
4 i wrote the story
5 rusted drew a font outline
6 i shaded it
7 im tired
warpus/wator/samurai/rusted representing lazarus