- -- y0lk number 91 : fruitopia caps!@ -- -
-- yes, im back again --
its me again. that wonderful y0lk guru, big hurt. also, known as the big
ouchy man and just plain ol hurt. if you are just tunning into the world
of y0lk then guess what, i returned in issue number 89. but, if you wanna
find out why i left in the first place, then you will have to grab all of
them to find out why. so har har har.
-- see, im a talking divider --
my dividers can talk like everyone elses. so har har har.
-- y0lktv --
coming to a station near you. weve got y0lktv. look for it this summer. but
here are some shows you will see on the new channel.
the creed show - hosted by that wacky y0lk member, creed. he has guest stars
and looney contests that the audience can win. if youre in
the audience you might be able to win your own the creed
show t-shirt, along with a bag fool of y0lktv and y0lk
goodies in a bag. woo woo.
the music hour - other than playing music videos between every show and one
at every commerical break, weve got the music hour, were
we play the hottest and latest music to come out.
the toons hour - the first week, we will have a double edge chalked filled
with this show. since cartoons just plain out rule. since
you can make them do whatever you want. also, in the first
week. you can make up a script and send it in. the best one
will win and will be made up and put on the show.
yellow journal - well, since big hurt threated us, we had to put his show
on the air. and he wanted it to be called yellow journal,
so that his zine name would get recognized more. hurt will
babble about anything dealing with his zine to the colors
of his boxer shorts.
the zine world - yes, weve got the zine world. were we stick a bunch of
established zine peoples, two somewhat established zine
writers, along with smuck that we find off of the street
corner. they all will be put into an apartment or house
for a couple months until they all go insane or make the
best zine ever.
today in zines - today in zines is a news show that updates you everyday
about the zine scene and about the people in the zine
scene. you might find out the foods that mogel eats or
what type of girlies trip hangs out with or even find out
how big hurt really is.
-- fruitopia caps --
there is a big thing going around about fruitopia caps. they are starting to
scarse. they are like a gold nugget and they are sure hard to come by. they
are silver caps that can you get into places, get you free stuff, and get
you discounts on special items.
you might even be able to use them to get the girl that you like to marry you
and pay for your honeymoon.
woa i got a fruitopia cap!@
to think we got a new currency laying right under our noses. get ride of the
paper money and silver coins. all we have to do is collect a shit load of
fruitopia caps and then when they decide to switch over the currency, the
ones that were smart and took my advise will be thilthy rich bastards.
probably richier than that computer geek, bill gates unless he does the
same.
-- -- this is a wall
wack, wack, wack. oh yeah.
hey divider. what are you doing back there.
-- -- this is a wall again.
umm, nothing at all. get out of here.
sure whatever. i think you are masterbating back there.
you know, every divider does it.
-- -- this is still the damn wall.
really.
-- good bye --
im sorry to say that mr divider and me have to go. but stay tuned in and
look for me to write in another issue of y0lk soon. and mr divider will
have a new style, so you will have to definitely come back and see that.
*** big hurt, y0lk pImp
-- samurai-notes --
bighurts come a long way, i guess. hes purty eleet now. i lubem.
-- index thinger --
.db.
title author
01 the other white meat creed
02 several k-leet hax0rs sittin around a campfire and groovin creed
03 nuclear weapons, global destruction, op wars. creed
04 a young man, an infant, a yak... all living in sin creed
05 household uses for afghanistanian food creed
06 pour cement down my anus hooch
07 hail santa! creed
08 hasidism and sysops - a pair for the nineties? hooch
09 lunchables rock. creed
10 t-shirts and toejam bedlam
11 nap-time - the dog prank - exclusive interview hooch
12 movie reviews showgirls!@ - win95 vs. os/2 sorta hooch
13 straight outta compton - dialchix - muh dawg!@ hooch
14 im a tall, goofy, dorky, chink phorce
15 bedazzled by the eliteness creed
16 how to blow your nuts out with cornstarch and orangina creed
17 i am a warez pup - who are you? hooch
18 lemmings phorce
19 the science of astrology belial
20 the notorious anticlimactic bastards of the zine scene cd/h0
21 dUcK 54uc3?!!? phorce
22 top 5000 reasons why i should kill myself creed
23 citrus fruits for sale phorce
24 group masturbation belial
25 ethereal experiences for perverted pyromaniacs creed
26 catering for the warez eleet phorce
27 brief mental pause belial
28 the army day camp belial
29 the geek theory, hickies, and another long day creed
30 nets, zines, and that chick from wings hooch
31 mentos! the freedom giver! mercuri
32 ramblings of a poseur bedlam
33 sitcoms, stereotypes, and satan creed
34 fuck you - a note to all yall on zines hooch
35 apples, oranges, and pears phorce
36 the little cultist that couldnt creed
37 careening through hyperspace at a slug-like rate creed
38 snowday phorce
39 creed is g0d creed
40 big hurt is ruler of the earth bighurt
41 dead people, nasty thoughts, and colored glue bighurt
42 bbs softwares/internet hooch
43 abandon thy gods! from yonder cometh y0lk! creed
44 mogels own very special personalized 1 y0lk issue phorce
45 your burro is no jackass! creed
46 rollerskates, indians, eagles and cougars creed
47 outer space, ice cream, streetcars and gophers creed
48 Evan the genius becomes enlightened and melts his face off creed
49 6 insignificant ziners in a bowling microcosm of life creed
50 the best of the worst creed
51 the prince of darkness versus some guy named dave trip
52 ode to my feet creed
53 hopelessly lost poots
54 the schoolhouse r0x! phorce
55 campbells chicken-noodle soup omen of death creed
56 dead cats juke
57 my inner taco handle
58 my place, or yours? mercuri
59 how to really use that spiffy monopoly money lumpy
60 struggle wif the giant pink elephant lucifer
61 why did the chicken cross the road? insane
62 y0lk test pattern mutter
63 ELiTE LiT from the master himself creed
64 creeds k-rad lit archives, volume two creed
65 UNSOPHISTICATED FASCIST BASTARDS. YOU DONT UNDERSTAND ME. creed
66 how y0lk saved my life sorta creed
67 shiny nickles, no more TP, and shitty knuckles ideal
68 some puppet plays phorce
69 ... Hello operator ... mutter
70 i bit my nail, now my finger is bleeding. traq
71 battle of the ants rage
72 fun on the phone ideal
73 yabba-dabba do, scooby-dooby do, and many other mysteries.. handle
74 i love you as my own mother sphrog
75 jamesy and the giant slinky jamesy
76 do not fuck with the big and hairy bears murmur
77 horror story oeb
78 dat wh0re s.sheep
79 the ewok rant taraxis
80 the arcade avenger tao
81 the night before 2600 d.cheez
82 journey into the mind of a no-brained counterculturist taraxis
83 a generic y0lk file mogel
84 cultural inclination? m.head
85 australia through the eyes of a spoon spoony
86 the life of a demented sysop spoony
87 little johnny carpenter franman
88 phan male ideal
89 bighurt is back! bighurt
90 the discovery channel sphrog
91 fruitopia caps!@ bighurt
TT
-infoez------------------------------------------------------------------
if you see your name on that chart, you are a y0lk member, whether you
like it or not. if you are a y0lk member, you have a y0lk member board, et
cetera.
phoenix 201 is the official eleet telecom section of y0lk.
hooch is the stupendous chief shephard of y0lk.
phorce is the head samurai of y0lk!@ beware!
mindcrime is a crazed oriental looking for revenge.
clarification: mindcrime may actually be a y0lk member. no one knows.
heil creed. HEIL! HEIL!
to get all the rest of the y0lks, ftp to ftp.openix.com /ftp/phorce/y0lk
or... call our world headquarters, erebus, at 201-762-1373. k-rad.
*or*... look for y0lkb0t on irc, efnet. type @y0lk number for y0lks.
OR... ATTENTION y0lkies! join the y0lk mailing list! chat about y0lk
and all them other zines, too! email listserv@magsystems.com with the line
subscribe y0lk in the body of the message.
OR! *new* alt.zines.y0lk! subscribe today! yes, folks, YOU can READ the
NEWSGROUP alt.zines.y0lk! isnt that special? join y0lknet too. thank phorce.
if you have ANY normal internet provider, you can read alt.zines.y0lk!@
dont you feel like youre getting a little too much information here?
couldnt we just show our ftp site and shut up? its just sad that we
have to advertise all our cheap media at the bottom of every textfile
like this. what a bunch of losers we are.