--y0lk-038.txt - snowday--------------------------------------------------
blo / zap! / / blo
tto---o0--/,------ --/ + +-// ++ ++ +/ -----,//----0o----tto
/ o / / // zot!@ o
im a / / / im a
chimp! // fueled by 1.2 billion chump!
/ watts of pure k-rad! /
--greetings.-----------------------------------------------------------------
happy new year. below is something from last year. before christmas, even.
--c:y0lk. ---------------------------------------------8088 section-----
y0lk - snowday
its kinda late - at least by my moms standards. im typing right now on an
old 8088 that doesnt usually work. it has been sitting here under the form-
ica desk for a few years since we got the 486.
i had to go downstairs to go get great expectations, a book were reading
for english. the last few days have been snow days, and, of course, i havent
done any homework. shit. im praying for a snowday tomorrow, but i doubt one
will come.
so i go downstairs, and my mom dad are smoking. not that i mind, but it
kinda bothers me. theres nothing i can do, anyway.
my dad is reading the latest newsweek. yknow, the one with the cover
nineteen ninety five - the internet year. my dad is reading about the net.
chris, do we have windows...
yes, dad.
do we have a modem...
no, dad. you see, i have to lie about these things. my parents dont know
i have a modem. i think my sister might know, but my parents just dont know.
my mom also an avid reader of newsweek read too many articles about those
evil sysops who come to your house, rob you, kill your relatives, and rape you.
i tried to explain that they were all lies, but my efforts were in vain.
do you know about the net
yeah.
do you have to subscribe - how much does it cost...
its not really one service, dad. you can get service from a lot of service
providers.
didnt really hear me well, we pay for the... umm... tv over there, the
cable bill... is it anything like that...
sorta. it can run from about 10-20 a month, dad.
resumes reading article entitled the net 50
you seen my great expectations...
my mom whats that...
my dad its a book, yknow, one of those things they had before computers..
in a bad attempt to try to poke fun at my computer habit
yeah. its a book.
sorry, chris - i havent seen it. why dont you go study...
thats what im trying to do, mom.
okay. bye.
i went upstairs. its funny how my dad is like that. sometimes he will get
all happy about computers and stuff. i think its just because he wants me
to have a career in computers or something. if you havent noticed, a few of
my keys dont work - like the quote-apostrophe key. also, i have no question
mark. also, the n key needs to be pressed a million times to get it to work
every now and then. its annoying... oh well.
so after i got back to my room, i looked under my bed. there it was. i cant
understand. i have absolutely NO idea how that book got under my bed. if it
was a magazine i could understand, because sometimes i fall asleep reading and
i find the magazine slipped between the matress and the wall and onto the
floor. but this really puzzles me. the book is pretty thick, and i dont
think it slipped between the matress and the wall. i guess it might have.
damn, this computer sucks. i tried using wp51 before to write this, but it
froze up after i was 1 page into it. damn it. it gave me some dumb error and
wouldnt stop beeping. i think it might be because i took out the i-o card..
so the disk drives wont work anymore. thats probably it.. im not sure.
so im writing this with the simple command - copy con y0lk. pretty easy, i
guess - i dont usually make typos, so im okay.
i hope i can squeeze a modem out of my parents this xmas. or at least consent
to go buy one myself... so i can keep the one ive got and say i just bought
its weird like that. my dad always sucked at anything electronic - the vcr,
the stereo - but he always liked the possibility that he could be... using his
computer if he wanted to learn how. he never really tried to learn, and pretty
much only uses it at the office, when he has to log in his hours he spends on
cases or something he said. just the other month i taught him how to delete
the network mail he gets. he had mail piling up from last year that he didnt
even know how to read, let alone erase. feh. at least he means well.
yknow how they have themes for the yearbook... well, my sister told me last
week that the yearbook commitee at her school chose this title-theme:
its all good.
i was amused. its a good phrase, but not something you want to keep for 50
years. itzallgood sounds like you just stepped out of mickey ds and are
samplin the fries or something - not something you say at the end of a year
at middle school. middle-schoolers are weird like dat. they elected q104.3 as
their favorite radio station.
im always raggin on my sisters musical preferences. shes all into that
wanna-be punk stuff... whatever. i dont even know. i just know that if shes
into it, it must be wannabe. then she disses on they might be giants. feh.
damn. i wonder how long this is. yknow, even though there are no quotes,
question marks, or apostrophes, i think this y0lk came out good. something
im proud of. another big reason for me ending this is that i have to go do
my english buddy book journals now and its gettin late.
i was gonna say something else, but i wont. i guess this y0lk really didnt
have a point but to let me write. i guess more therapy than an actual y0lk.
as that guy in for better or for worse would say. but i dont care. im
sure that theres someone out there infatuated with my life. that reminds me.
if you ARE infatuated with my life, dont be afraid to drop me a line. i just
renewed my shell acct, so people can email me at:
sphrog@nexxus.novasys.com
please - even if its just to say i hAT3 y0LK, dEWd@! dont be afraid. i
want feedback. sometimes i just cant believe that someone who lives in
chicago would write for this pathetic piece-of-shit zine.
one more thing - someone should send all the dtos to newsweek.com - so they
wont keep hyping all those dumb webzines. they really praise those guys too
much, and all those webzines are such hyped-up chic urban trendsetting cyber-
funk garbage. givem dto, if they want witty commentary on what happens on
the information superhighway. who the fuck cares if i made that quote up. i
was too lazy to go down and get the magazine, but it says something like that
in there about those webzine guys. damn.
i hope those made a nice y0lk. it wasnt funny, didnt say anything about sex,
and didnt call someone stupid, so im not sure how lil piece of crud ranks
on the zine chart.
phorce/chris ? shit. i cannot fucking believe that. i write the whole fucking
article, and now my ? key works. like buttah. JEEZUS FUCKING CHRIST. well,
im not going to go fix that. just read where you think question marks should
go. i sometimes put in ... cuz i wanted some kind of punctuation.
phorce/chris out
--eleet!@------------------------------------------------------end 8088-----
welp.. its after xmas. and i did get my modem. whoo-hoo. what a surprise.
now i can be more of a c0mp0o-doRk than i already am.
it actually came as a complete surprise to me.. i think its my moms way of
saying, i know about the modem youve already got hidden, muhahahaha.
i thanked my mom, cuz its a 28.8 and now i have to sell my old 14.4, which
will get me . w0o.
you dont know the tremendous effort i put into bringing this y0lk to you. i
had to pull out the i/o card on my newer comp, stick it in the old comp,
find a low-density disk, slap my hard drive around actually, i just only
nudged it gently, copy to a disk, bring disk to newer comp, and write this
dumb postscript. plus, i drew an asskee. wow.
also - i know you loved the ass-key. i made it all myself. w0o!@ im an
ascii artist!@ yay. also, on the subject of ascii which is commonly mis-
pronounced ass-kai :
ASCII
The ASCII Protocol pronounced asky is a seven-bit protocol that consists of
the 128 characters... etc...
wow!@ it says pronounced asky!@ thats great!
--results of y0lk 35 xmas------------------------------------------------
current tally of orders received: 1
did you send ? doubtful, but if you did, and my p.o. box monkey-boy is a
thieving rat, then email me at phorce@erebus.magsystems.com y0lk whq!.
--index---------------------------------------------------------------------
title author
01 the other white meat creed
02 several k-leet hax0rs sittin around a campfire and groovin creed
03 nuclear weapons, global destruction, op wars. creed
04 a young man, an infant, a yak... all living in sin creed
05 household uses for afghanistanian food creed
06 pour cement down my anus hooch
07 hail santa! creed
08 hasidism and sysops - a pair for the nineties? hooch
09 lunchables rock. creed
10 t-shirts and toejam bedlam
11 nap-time - the dog prank - exclusive interview hooch
12 movie reviews showgirls!@ - win95 vs. os/2 sorta hooch
13 straight outta compton - dialchix - muh dawg!@ hooch
14 im a tall, goofy, dorky, chink phorce
15 bedazzled by the eliteness creed
16 how to blow your nuts out with cornstarch and orangina creed
17 i am a warez pup - who are you? hooch
18 lemmings phorce
19 the science of astrology belial
20 the notorious anticlimactic bastards of the zine scene cd/h0
21 dUcK 54uc3?!!? phorce
22 top 5000 reasons why i should kill myself creed
23 citrus fruits for sale phorce
24 group masturbation belial
25 ethereal experiences for perverted pyromaniacs creed
26 catering for the warez eleet phorce
27 brief mental pause belial
28 the army day camp belial
29 the geek theory, hickies, and another long day creed
30 nets, zines, and that chick from wings hooch
31 mentos! the freedom giver! mercuri
32 ramblings of a poseur bedlam
33 sitcoms, stereotypes, and satan creed
34 fuck you - a note to all yall on zines hooch
35 apples, oranges, and pears phorce
36 the little cultist that couldnt creed
37 careening through hyperspace at a slug-like rate creed
38 snowday phorce
if you see your name on that chart, you are a y0lk member, whether you
like it or not. if you are a y0lk member, you have a y0lk member board, et
cetera. woog.
mindcrime is an official y0lk member.
blo / zap! / / blo
tto---o0--/,------ --/ + +-// ++ ++ +/ -----,//----0o----tto
/ o / / // zot!@ o
im a / / / im a
chimp! // fueled by 1.2 billion chump!
/ watts of pure k-rad! /
--greetings.-----------------------------------------------------------------
happy new year. below is something from last year. before christmas, even.
--c:y0lk. ---------------------------------------------8088 section-----
y0lk - snowday
its kinda late - at least by my moms standards. im typing right now on an
old 8088 that doesnt usually work. it has been sitting here under the form-
ica desk for a few years since we got the 486.
i had to go downstairs to go get great expectations, a book were reading
for english. the last few days have been snow days, and, of course, i havent
done any homework. shit. im praying for a snowday tomorrow, but i doubt one
will come.
so i go downstairs, and my mom dad are smoking. not that i mind, but it
kinda bothers me. theres nothing i can do, anyway.
my dad is reading the latest newsweek. yknow, the one with the cover
nineteen ninety five - the internet year. my dad is reading about the net.
chris, do we have windows...
yes, dad.
do we have a modem...
no, dad. you see, i have to lie about these things. my parents dont know
i have a modem. i think my sister might know, but my parents just dont know.
my mom also an avid reader of newsweek read too many articles about those
evil sysops who come to your house, rob you, kill your relatives, and rape you.
i tried to explain that they were all lies, but my efforts were in vain.
do you know about the net
yeah.
do you have to subscribe - how much does it cost...
its not really one service, dad. you can get service from a lot of service
providers.
didnt really hear me well, we pay for the... umm... tv over there, the
cable bill... is it anything like that...
sorta. it can run from about 10-20 a month, dad.
resumes reading article entitled the net 50
you seen my great expectations...
my mom whats that...
my dad its a book, yknow, one of those things they had before computers..
in a bad attempt to try to poke fun at my computer habit
yeah. its a book.
sorry, chris - i havent seen it. why dont you go study...
thats what im trying to do, mom.
okay. bye.
i went upstairs. its funny how my dad is like that. sometimes he will get
all happy about computers and stuff. i think its just because he wants me
to have a career in computers or something. if you havent noticed, a few of
my keys dont work - like the quote-apostrophe key. also, i have no question
mark. also, the n key needs to be pressed a million times to get it to work
every now and then. its annoying... oh well.
so after i got back to my room, i looked under my bed. there it was. i cant
understand. i have absolutely NO idea how that book got under my bed. if it
was a magazine i could understand, because sometimes i fall asleep reading and
i find the magazine slipped between the matress and the wall and onto the
floor. but this really puzzles me. the book is pretty thick, and i dont
think it slipped between the matress and the wall. i guess it might have.
damn, this computer sucks. i tried using wp51 before to write this, but it
froze up after i was 1 page into it. damn it. it gave me some dumb error and
wouldnt stop beeping. i think it might be because i took out the i-o card..
so the disk drives wont work anymore. thats probably it.. im not sure.
so im writing this with the simple command - copy con y0lk. pretty easy, i
guess - i dont usually make typos, so im okay.
i hope i can squeeze a modem out of my parents this xmas. or at least consent
to go buy one myself... so i can keep the one ive got and say i just bought
its weird like that. my dad always sucked at anything electronic - the vcr,
the stereo - but he always liked the possibility that he could be... using his
computer if he wanted to learn how. he never really tried to learn, and pretty
much only uses it at the office, when he has to log in his hours he spends on
cases or something he said. just the other month i taught him how to delete
the network mail he gets. he had mail piling up from last year that he didnt
even know how to read, let alone erase. feh. at least he means well.
yknow how they have themes for the yearbook... well, my sister told me last
week that the yearbook commitee at her school chose this title-theme:
its all good.
i was amused. its a good phrase, but not something you want to keep for 50
years. itzallgood sounds like you just stepped out of mickey ds and are
samplin the fries or something - not something you say at the end of a year
at middle school. middle-schoolers are weird like dat. they elected q104.3 as
their favorite radio station.
im always raggin on my sisters musical preferences. shes all into that
wanna-be punk stuff... whatever. i dont even know. i just know that if shes
into it, it must be wannabe. then she disses on they might be giants. feh.
damn. i wonder how long this is. yknow, even though there are no quotes,
question marks, or apostrophes, i think this y0lk came out good. something
im proud of. another big reason for me ending this is that i have to go do
my english buddy book journals now and its gettin late.
i was gonna say something else, but i wont. i guess this y0lk really didnt
have a point but to let me write. i guess more therapy than an actual y0lk.
as that guy in for better or for worse would say. but i dont care. im
sure that theres someone out there infatuated with my life. that reminds me.
if you ARE infatuated with my life, dont be afraid to drop me a line. i just
renewed my shell acct, so people can email me at:
sphrog@nexxus.novasys.com
please - even if its just to say i hAT3 y0LK, dEWd@! dont be afraid. i
want feedback. sometimes i just cant believe that someone who lives in
chicago would write for this pathetic piece-of-shit zine.
one more thing - someone should send all the dtos to newsweek.com - so they
wont keep hyping all those dumb webzines. they really praise those guys too
much, and all those webzines are such hyped-up chic urban trendsetting cyber-
funk garbage. givem dto, if they want witty commentary on what happens on
the information superhighway. who the fuck cares if i made that quote up. i
was too lazy to go down and get the magazine, but it says something like that
in there about those webzine guys. damn.
i hope those made a nice y0lk. it wasnt funny, didnt say anything about sex,
and didnt call someone stupid, so im not sure how lil piece of crud ranks
on the zine chart.
phorce/chris ? shit. i cannot fucking believe that. i write the whole fucking
article, and now my ? key works. like buttah. JEEZUS FUCKING CHRIST. well,
im not going to go fix that. just read where you think question marks should
go. i sometimes put in ... cuz i wanted some kind of punctuation.
phorce/chris out
--eleet!@------------------------------------------------------end 8088-----
welp.. its after xmas. and i did get my modem. whoo-hoo. what a surprise.
now i can be more of a c0mp0o-doRk than i already am.
it actually came as a complete surprise to me.. i think its my moms way of
saying, i know about the modem youve already got hidden, muhahahaha.
i thanked my mom, cuz its a 28.8 and now i have to sell my old 14.4, which
will get me . w0o.
you dont know the tremendous effort i put into bringing this y0lk to you. i
had to pull out the i/o card on my newer comp, stick it in the old comp,
find a low-density disk, slap my hard drive around actually, i just only
nudged it gently, copy to a disk, bring disk to newer comp, and write this
dumb postscript. plus, i drew an asskee. wow.
also - i know you loved the ass-key. i made it all myself. w0o!@ im an
ascii artist!@ yay. also, on the subject of ascii which is commonly mis-
pronounced ass-kai :
ASCII
The ASCII Protocol pronounced asky is a seven-bit protocol that consists of
the 128 characters... etc...
wow!@ it says pronounced asky!@ thats great!
--results of y0lk 35 xmas------------------------------------------------
current tally of orders received: 1
did you send ? doubtful, but if you did, and my p.o. box monkey-boy is a
thieving rat, then email me at phorce@erebus.magsystems.com y0lk whq!.
--index---------------------------------------------------------------------
title author
01 the other white meat creed
02 several k-leet hax0rs sittin around a campfire and groovin creed
03 nuclear weapons, global destruction, op wars. creed
04 a young man, an infant, a yak... all living in sin creed
05 household uses for afghanistanian food creed
06 pour cement down my anus hooch
07 hail santa! creed
08 hasidism and sysops - a pair for the nineties? hooch
09 lunchables rock. creed
10 t-shirts and toejam bedlam
11 nap-time - the dog prank - exclusive interview hooch
12 movie reviews showgirls!@ - win95 vs. os/2 sorta hooch
13 straight outta compton - dialchix - muh dawg!@ hooch
14 im a tall, goofy, dorky, chink phorce
15 bedazzled by the eliteness creed
16 how to blow your nuts out with cornstarch and orangina creed
17 i am a warez pup - who are you? hooch
18 lemmings phorce
19 the science of astrology belial
20 the notorious anticlimactic bastards of the zine scene cd/h0
21 dUcK 54uc3?!!? phorce
22 top 5000 reasons why i should kill myself creed
23 citrus fruits for sale phorce
24 group masturbation belial
25 ethereal experiences for perverted pyromaniacs creed
26 catering for the warez eleet phorce
27 brief mental pause belial
28 the army day camp belial
29 the geek theory, hickies, and another long day creed
30 nets, zines, and that chick from wings hooch
31 mentos! the freedom giver! mercuri
32 ramblings of a poseur bedlam
33 sitcoms, stereotypes, and satan creed
34 fuck you - a note to all yall on zines hooch
35 apples, oranges, and pears phorce
36 the little cultist that couldnt creed
37 careening through hyperspace at a slug-like rate creed
38 snowday phorce
if you see your name on that chart, you are a y0lk member, whether you
like it or not. if you are a y0lk member, you have a y0lk member board, et
cetera. woog.
mindcrime is an official y0lk member.
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