Not AGAIN! l i t by Nitnatsnoc bop zow This is Cthulu of Mistigris Welcome to my solo pack This evening we we will be focusing on the rightmost of my tentacles that is my writings In the interests of good taste I will be saving discussion of the lobster and brick until our adult show later tonight where I read all of my poems naked If you ask me nicely I ll explain them to you on the IRC You may think that a meg and a half is a lot of size for writing to be taking up and you d be right Raw text-wise that s well on the way to a dictionary but I don t claim to contain anywhere near so much the focus on this archive is not myself but rather those I have worked with The subtitle of this collection is Illustrations and Descriptions and thus what we have here is not so much a collection of my writings (and certainly in most cases not of my favorite instances of my writings) but rather those you would have seen lit for the scene contained in the company of graphics and pictures in most cases describing either the picture it accompanies or the name of the bulletin board they both promote In considerably fewer cases the graphics illustrate what the words put forth and in a couple of cases the juxtaposition of word and pixel is a completely spurious and irrelevant one We don t like to talk about those much so if you ll just follow me I d like to take you on a bit of a tour though my illustrious and pathetic scene career all dressed up and nowhere to go Oh yes I almost forgot - one more note before we proceed though I have maintained the integrity (ugh that word gives me stomachaches) of all of the pieces contained herein (file dates match those of the original release where applicable for those of you who like to view things chronologically and in progression) these poems have never looked so good before ending up in this archive they were all combed and scrubbed and any and all ugly misspellings have been surreptitiously tidied up from the goofy state they may have inadvertently been released in - in the case of one poem entire lines were omitted in the release but letters and words have been mangled here and there over the years For this pack they have been restored to their original state that you can experience if not the sheer literary merit which was never theirs at least the impeccability of their rhythm and rhyme schemes In addition to those changes to avoid any confusion I have changed all occurrences of my e-mail address to show my current one just in case anyone tries to refer to them to contact me SAUCE information has as well been updated in a few cases and if you feel that with these changes accounted for these still don t quite reflect your memories well remember that things ain t what they used to be and in most cases they never were 8) making the most of my limitations For your entertainment a review of sigs and headers used on occasion by myself to assert creative ownership over released product - - - -- by ___ Would you believe me if I told you ( that this sort of thing was elite in C T H _ ) U L U ! 1994 )( _ _ ( ) _ _ No neither would I ( ) ) ( ( ) Why choose the LESSER of two evils ! I acually used this in messages on BBSes One less thing we have to (c) IMPERiAL 94 worry about these days - - - -- Though we had our disagreements (see Integrity) Darkforce was gracious enough to revamp the C T H U L U ! hideous ASCII octopus in a marginally-less-hideous ANSI incarnation after I wrote a lit for his board House of Style At the time I was very upset that we still had to resort to the high- ASCII character for the eyes (There were very fiercely delineated boundaries between ANSI and ASCII in those days and newschool ASCII was Why choose the LESSER of two evils ! still a glimmer in kHz s eye ) Do not summon up that which ye cannot put down (c) iMPERiAL 94 It s interesting that I flaunted most of these affectations of eliteness at a time when I was arguably my least elite ever a minor cog in a group whose main claim to success was merging with GRiP AD In fact I think that I adopted the use of these sigs before I d even released anything (Then again that took months And my migration from the ANSI department to the lit division is a story all its own ) - - - -- A nice touch emerging from the frame of I am 31l73++ my first attempt at subtle social commentary illustrated by Eerie before he exploded Why choose the LESSER of two evils ! Do not summon up that which ye cannot put down The sig was apparently used without intentional irony - - - -- Poem written by My favorite of my various Cthulu of Mistigris identifying marks a more compact and less TABNet- centric version of the illustration crowning this infofile Key among this preference is that it promotes my group as much as it promotes myself - any prominence I attained in the scene (through guest Mistigris appearances in ANSI collaborations in other groups - now it all starts to make sense) was strictly in an (unsuccessful) attempt to draw attention to my struggling group More on that later oh yeah - this is by Nitnatsnoc bless his Queen-y heart - - - -- some cleverness So you can have some idea as to the utter trash topics I was provided to work with over the years I include here a sample 1993 WareZ BBS name generator Simply match one word in COLUMN A with a word from COLUMN B (adding of s and The s where appropriate) and voila! An authentic 1992-1994 era BBS name! All words (and non-words see Grindoris ) appearing in this generator we were used in real BBSes most of which actually went up at some point! And as a bonus to you I include sample end rhymes for the words in column B so you can try your hand at making your own geniune elite lits which at one time were considered to be worth leech access on a local 7-to-10-day board COLUMN A COLUMN B rhymes with Screaming Toaster coaster Digital Dream scream Forged Insanity inanity Euphoric Doom gloom Chronic Madness sadness Harvest Perception (censored) Altar Domain again Morbid Delusions illusions Total Eclipse bogomips Virtual Grindoris ( ) florist Dark Sacrifice fuzzy dice Altered Moon spoon Elusive Necrosis halitosis Lethal Dreamscape cheesecake Sarcastic Reality banality Evil Holocaust lost Suicidal Tomato potato Menacing Asylum phylum Dreams Voracity elasticity Fatal - X flex Silicon Sector nectar coping nicely thank you As anyone who s been keeping track can see my profile in the scene has been even lower recently than it was before - keeping for the most part clear from releases of all sorts but also far and beyond primarily absent (except as an incorrigible idler) on the IRC if this gets to be too much just flip down to the end of this section Fans of mine may be glad to know that I m still writing enemies may be glad to know that it s for the most part exclusively in real-life contexts and forums I ve been participating more and more in open-stage events and poetry slams in coffeeshops and bars for the past few years and now appear regularly 4-5 times a month at various regular events around town - strictly as a hobby still but though the potential audiences are smaller than the scene both the proportion and even sheer number of them who actually pay attention is considerably greater - encouragement as it were to continue devoting myself to such a forum (Disclaimer though there are occasionally people in black turtlenecks and berets present at such events more often than not it is in an indulgence of intentional self-parody Spoken word events can be fun if you allow yourself to enjoy them so check one out near you!) One I especially endorse is an event which I enjoyed so much I decided to help put it on every month and a half (or so) interested parties in the area put some volunteer effort into putting on a Living Closet - what began as a wine and cheese network-session-cum-house-party equal parts folio exhibition and MC-duel now puts on free seven-hour performances for hundreds of fellow artists and art enthusiasts exhibiting art on the walls of the event creating art collaboratively on-site and most of all establishing connections between different previously unrelated (and unknown) factions of the local arts communities As people who find themselves on #ansi after 6 years can ensorse a community can be a compelling thing but a community you can see hear and (in a few cases) touch can be by so many degrees that much more compelling The bottom line live art still rocks at least as much as computer art so get your ass out there and check it out As far as computer art goes however I have still been writing - in prolific and dare I say copious quantities - in an online forum which most of you are probably unaware of Under my new (extra-scene) online identity Pseudo_Intellectual I have become the number one contributor (with some 3000 submissions) to the Everything encyclopedia of ideas thoughts dreams poems knowledge and trivia brought to you by the guys who run SlashDot Beyond that I am still as well active on bulletin boards No I am not referring to dial-up Renegade and Telegard BBSes (even the 604 s stalwart scene has dwindled to one or two PD megaliths hardly worth calling) nor to telnet boards which always gave the impression of trying to be something they weren t instead of focusing on new strengths which could be theirs Message-threading systems (similar to Acheron s discussion bases) are out there and possess great possibility of potency potential I m a regular on four or five of them and though it s never quite as good as it was when we were 13 it s still a fair sight better than #ansi I never really intended to quit the scene - I never really intended for Mistigris to stop releasing (as anyone I ve solicited for art over the past few months will testify ) and though I ve had a few quasi-legitimate excuses for its disappearance (hardware incompatibility for house network leaving me offline hard drive crashes switching over to linux and learning it - very slowly going to college having a life etc etc) the thing (a benign tumour - has anyone here seen Videodrome ) which drives me to release never quite got satisfied you can take the boy out of the scene but you can t take the scene out of the boy As such I m interested in releasing whatever I can round up from my recent-past scene incarnation (everything I could scrape together since the last mist release) and am interested in getting back into themed pack release and e-mag publication with one eye to the scene one to the greater net culture out there and one eye to the real-world art community But I ll need some help Get ahold of me if you re interested in working with me and or the sort of thing I ve described One of the easiest things I have in mind is another one of these This pack contains all of my collaborations to date and it s taken six years to amass everything in it Yet keep in mind that probably only 10% of the lits I ever wrote for the scene (for collaborations) ever got used This means a big backlog of much of my best stuff If you re interested in a Cthulu lit for your next big undestined ANSI drop me a line and I ll point a nice juicy unreleased poem in your direction Beyond that I m interested with furthering what was only realized a couple of times in this archive - illustration That is instead of the picture and writing only being paired because they re both promoting the same board group e-mag brand of detergent the picture is actually thematically consistant with the subject matter and tone of the poem provided Since I can t draw worth a spit I need someone to help me illustrate - I enjoy working with both high and low-resolution artists but if no aid is offered I may have to resort to the ansificator!@^% That s right ladies and gentlemen! 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(notetoconsumertheroomhadanopeneddoor) Seventeen out of twenty-two doctors recognize the ANSIFICATOR when threatened at gunpoint! (originalsurveysizetwentyfive) Now you might think this one product is enough! That genius has it s limits! But we here at CRAZYDAWG have proven you wrong again! (youmiserablystupidcretinousidiots) It s the perfect accessory to the ANSIFICATOR a necessary addition to the 21st century home! It s technologically advanced constructed entirely out of information-age materials it s the amazing obsequious ponteriffic fantasterrificabulous LITERATOR! Achieve new levels of literification with this astounding product! With a few simple selections the LITERATOR can spontaneously emit a veritable tidal-wave of rhymes diction metaphor and florific allegories concerning the subject matter OF YOUR CHOICE! It s easy to operate! (justpressthebuttonthebigredbuttonnonotthebluebuttonohmygodhehitthebluebutton! runforyourlivesit sallgoingupinsmoke!) Need an elegy for your mother s funeral The LITERATOR is on the job! Need to serenade that sexy chick from the office The LITERATOR can do it! Need to cash in on pyramid marketing schemes The LITERATOR is your machine! Need to impress your friends by getting published in a literary magazine of high pomp and circumstance THE LITERATOR IS FOR YOU! (warning poemssuck) Both these versatile useful products can be yours if you act now for the affordable price of only $155 99! They slice they dice they ansify and literificate! You can t afford to pass up this opportunity! (officialpriceofpassingupthisopportunity zerodollarszerocents) And if you act now you will not only recieve the amazing ANSIFICATOR and the astounding LITERATOR 2000 (English Version) but you will also aquire the ANSLITIFERATOROR Up-Link Cable! Similar to cables used to access the Internet! Recognized by ten out of four dentists! Use this device to link your ANSIFICATOR to your LITERATOR and paint the town RED! (warningonlytwoshadesofredavailable) You will be able to simultaneously reduce any overly-complex and tedious experience into an astounding glob of LARGE TWO-DIMENSIONAL BLOCKS and INSENSIBLE POETIC JARGON-TEXT! Hours of fun and entertainment! Impress your friends! Destroy your enemies! Obtain hot babes! (getalife) Introspective trivia Top 5 favorites in this archive as the epitome of clever punchy metered and as eye candy wholly as well-integrated ultimately meaningless ignoring (if not pieces of art lit for the scene discounting) the - ansi ornamentation writing 1 id-intox ans zii-staq ans us-lok1 ans 2 us-mess jpg uu7-salt ans fv-fc3 ans 3 nt-btek ans si-ttt1 ice ar-epic1 ans 4 us-stars ans us-gecko ans df-girl1 ans 5 nitct-hi ans us-clock ans multi-01 drk *bonus* ctmz-les ans (which ones I like the writing most of all you have to figure out for yourself) - - - -- Number of suspected Gif2Ansi d pieces in this pack 2 5 (can you guess which ones they are ) stuffs by Questor and White Trash -- - - - missing from this pack Walking home from Benny s one night - RIPscrip illustration by Lady Blue lost in a hard drive crash If you know of her whereabouts please contact me Mistigris Blender Kombat entry for the kid choking to death on a lego block - - - -- Never released publically before tsct-tpo ans us-stars ans -- - - - Top 5 artists I most regret not having collaborated with (in descending order) numb Inquisitor Silver Rat Corinthian the 4th Disciple and I wish I d made non-blender collaborations with more mist ansi folks! grr! - - - -- Top 5 subjectively greatest offenders in most consistent outstanding or serial failures to make good on promises offers of collaboration (especially after the pieces were already written) (in descending order) aka foul temptress es Grateful Dead (My 2nd lit left hanging for going on seven years now!) Inner Vision (who I m convinced leaves the scene every time I find him again ) Cain (who killed his group Oasis only after I made a lit for it) The Extremist (2 pieces one of which was for his own board!) Creator (1 piece but one I really liked) Inazone (1 piece) -- - - - Greatest inspiration to start writing for the scene Israfel GOTHiC - - - -- Greatest inspirations to continue writing in the scene Schtroumph and Cenobite Argon and Visions -- - - - Greatest discouragements to continue writing in the scene BlueDevil and ScrollZ - - - -- Members (er let me rephrase that) Artists who knowingly or unknowingly appear in this pack Avenger CatBones Corinthian Creator Cthulu Darkforce Dead Soul Deviate Dieznyik (Nootropic) 33rie The Extremist Fever Fire From Heaven God Among Lice The Green Hornet Grim Reaper Halaster Happyfish Haquisaq Iodine Iori Yagami Ironghost Kitiara Kyp Lady Blue Mage Mainline Mavrik Mmmelk Mongul Nitnatsnoc Patrick Monnahan Prison Breaker Prisonernumberone Prophet Pure Voltage Questor Quip Scope Shaft The Silent Killer Skrubly Smokescreen Spirit of Illusion Stone the Crow Tabaqui Tincat Tomppa tRc ( ) tricolore Trip Ts Vengeance Wator White Trash Zamfir Worshipper and ZeusII -- - - - Sites (not Mistigris sites but places of interest) The Living Closet http livingcloset vancouver bc ca Everything http everything slashdot org BBSes http www everything2 com too! Bonk (TabNet) http bonk dynip com UNCENSORED! BBS http uncnsrd mt-kisco ny us The Obloid Sphere http www obloidsphere com - - - -- in conclusion sigs appearing in this infofile by respectively Nitnatsnoc Cthulu Darkforce 33rie and Nitnatsnoc ANSIFICATOR text by Zamfir Worshipper FILE_ID DIZ by Corinthian cthulu handy-dandy access stat sheet handles Zaphod Beeblebrox The Happy Flower Man Anomie Joconde Flambeau Mogus Bogus the Prince of Pride Pseudo_Intellectual how Cthulu is pronounced kuh-THOO-loo what Cthulu is a giant alien god with an octopus for a head do I know it s misspelt Cthulhu was taken by an early Remorse ASCII artist e-mail address pseudo_intellect@hotmail com where he can be reached #everything on the slashnet as p_i-whatever get ready to read g re e ts Everyone I met on my trip to europe and haven t worked with yet Tarot Crayon Mongi Alla Xul Shere Khan dr shizuma and a cast of thousands!