Oh humans! What a confusing creature we ar-- -but let s cut the philosophical crap right now and get right to the issue I suggest a new style of writing called the colloquial essay In these fast-paced days of high technology people just don t have the attention span necessary to read a boring formal 5-part essay So why not write essays in a form similar to a magazine article in a much more easy-to-read style The idea behind the colloquial essay is to sound like you are talking to the reader the only difference is the column width! Ok the first point is that the old style of essay writing is out That s right because people just have to think too hard to read something that s written in a formal elevated holier than thou style As well a lot of people don t understand the vocabulary used in those technical essays So what type of magazine articles do you mean Well anything from the in-your-face style of the Discorder to the semi-respectable chit-chat of Vancouver or Saturday Night The grammar doesn t have to be perfect As long as it s easy to read! So you re tryin to sound like you re talking to the reader Yeah it s like an easy-to-follow conversation It s loosely based on Plato s Socratic dialogues in that sense too the colloquial essay strives to provide a firm logical philosophical proof of the argument In conclusion if you want to write an essay that stands out from the rest in its clarity brevity and wit and still gets the point across - in short an A essay why not try the colloquial essay It just might work -Basic