st Today s TALES BOO! ACID HACKED MY HARD DRIVE or HOW TO HAVE YOUR OWN CHILDREN or SUDDENLY CHANGING YOUR DOGS FOOD CAN LEAD UPSET STOMACH OR EVEN DIARREAHHA@#$% pac-man ghost There s this movie on tv right now called bloodsport or something and that Van Damme guy is in it and these fighter guys are breaking yes breaking each other I m beginning to think it may reach the eliteness level of hackers mabye kinda nevermind look i got a new divider bar bask in its eliteness (due to the large divider bar worker s union strike the divider bar will not be appearing in this episode ) uhho it looks like we ll have to get replacement divider bars on to the story SUDDENLY CHANGING YOUR DOGS FOOD CAN LE no not that one ACID HACKED MY HARD DRIVE there we go %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%a%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%$$%%%%%%%%%$ ^replacement divider bar^ It was a normal day at the apartment Arm donut was listening to Neil Diamond I was listening to the three tenors and everybody else was listening to some freaks who in their blood stream alone contained the annual illegal narcotics output of several third world countries bOOM bOOM bOOM bOOM bOOM bOOM bOOM went their screeching faces Then there came a rap rap rapping at our door Splatt answered the door and in came a a man around the age of 17 or so He was ill He also could draw a decent logo so we took him in and put him in bed He was asleep for three days till he woke up and asked for food Cytral promptly tried to pour some bleach with fighting chlorine action down his throat but the stranger told him that eddie the magical electrical outlet who gives small rewards to children who play with other peoples underwear wasnt real and cytral ran off crying (for those people who feel that i should be commited to a mental hospital right about now just remember i m free and i look JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE BWHAHAHAHAHA =) So anyway the mysterious mystery man told us his story as follows (A agreement has been reached between the owners and the divider bar worker s union the regular divider bars will be appearing shortly) Well after deep investigation i found that the mans story is straight out of the book 1945 Year of decisions Memoirs by Harry S Truman so i m not going to go into it _ s%#S$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$a ^ your regularly scheduled divider bar ^ The man known to us as man soon became a part of the apartment He drew logos for us regularly and soon became a member of eclipse Little did we know that he was having secret meetings with rAd mAn Here is part of a taped meeting between man and rAd mAn man mother! i have gained their trust! rm excellent soon my plan will be completed in full! man thank you mother soon we shall repopulate the world together! rm n no I m going to have my own kids by having several sex changes in order to get my self pregnant with my own sperm and then after i have my baby i m going to become male and do it all over again your job is tBZZZZTTT ESDGFC and that is all there was of the tape OH MY GOD IRISH SPRING SPORT BODY SOAP KILLS GERMS THAT CAUSE BODY ORDER@#!$% sorry i got excited I love irish spring i use their soap and deoderant it is the scent of the elite hacker that reminds me here is what happened with man and how he haxOred rais hard drive (whoopZ@!# there was a small clause in the contract that the workers dont agree to and they are once again on strike ) well after about a week late at night the man went into the living room and haxOred rais computer he was an elite one alright ohno!# it says login what do i do#$^ hmm NEW yES@#% ! i haxored this system I gained access to the url isp trash files oh no! the bus cdrom byte modem card linkup has a password! i ll override it with the 16bit high ascii virus html code yes! dos! c format c this will HAXOR RAIS HARD DRIVE do you want to continue y and with a flash he left the building %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%a%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%$$%%%%%%%%%$ ^replacement divider bar^ the next morning rai was so angry that he broke all my soundtracks and my three tenors tapes and cds so i was forced to put him in the scorpion death lock(also known as the sharpshooter) and due to excessive damage caused by my devastating manuver rai hasnt spoken or walked for weeks that is the story up until this point um bye the endor next time you see bra1n mindcrime belial splatt widowmaker mrm or cytral on irc tell them that i am more elite than them =)