and and and and when i forgot that people hated me it hit me all over again they hate me and i love it i thought that my purpose was gone but it still existed it was just latent it hid from me the whispers became reality again all over again it all came back to remind me they helped me remind me off the situation they were the situation and it clogs my throat in trying to speak the words that mean the most the most doesn t belong anymore nothing belongs where it should anymore what seems is not what matters doesn t it s all paradox it s become only the sweet irony that is so coincidental So coincidental green Green it clicks two thoughts that became clear yet distant yet so coincidental lack of understanding or is it knowledge i forget the difference almost everything seems so subconscious it s cause i m so lazy i m not thinking for they re all around me they are all talking at once and this is the only way i can think for myself by letting my subconscious and fingers blurt out the fuzzy logic i m brainstorming what happened today and i m not sure not even sure about myself i ll be there i am there i m just not visable to the m naked eye not yet but i Am there where s the portal to the door where is the money flowing from the poor waving bybye the c kooky people i thought i d meet they are still ready i m just going to buy christmas presents for me bro and for who ever i can find a gift for i ve bought most of my stuff already all i need is a really nice card for me gram and gramp chill to that the radio makes me think beyond lyrics it makes me wonder why i can t seem to wrap my feelings around thoughts no what i mean is to wrap my thoughts around a tangible surface everything is quite emotional and reasonable it s all believable but there isn t any substance But there s the Radio and i find the snow and my wasted kank in the past and in front of me is the sky that carries the moon that grins with a puffy smile puff is only a floatational device fluf is a love that waits beyond a shadow that waits beyond my shadow of doubt i doubt myself and yet i believe and that song on the radio yes it is a beer commercial! yet i am not amazed i am lost in my own haze and their craze why do i care what they think of me what is her motive why should i care what does the future bring why am i so indecisive why don t i just make up my mind and make it concrete i understand why she might not be there cause everyone but me will be there heh ego s clash and i forget what matters is she working is she afraid of the other people that will be there and envelope themselves in her beauty to share her space to breath the same air my clich-ay i m a little bit tired and i fear this is my fuzzy logic and the radio only playes songs that i want to here hear my hangds typo the situation i will be there and i will hope that i see her i hope that i respond to a slap on the side of the face yes yes a slap to the face is what i need a spanking of bakchands across the shoulder or against arms some people were just talking to me i will try to give courage to em i ll try to kink out my aura to fit in a welcoming Function to funk their motive to groove to the same tune of course we all have luck and yonder we have our standards we have our standards but we can groove or or we can try to groove to tehthethe same ttiny tune the radio the radio my salvation it makes more sense than my own thoughts i can hear the message clearer clearer the thee day has made me weak weak i wasn st wasn t listening for a moment i wasn t keeping track i just kind a a a ah was i was for a moement now i m not this the end of a day keep on typing i am hurt somewhere on the inside yet i can t seem to grip on ot on it the radio calls me to thikn about something else i start thinking about the tune the tune ity s futile it s furtile fertile hey that typo stuff gets the mind working i think i m going to give myself some reading s i feel like sleeping i feel like creeping stalking am i stalking i am just awing i m ayeing and awaiting the same situation that calls me o to think to know that i m a prick yes into those crush and crutch myself away and try to cry cause they re now playing some pearl jam i can t comprehend the lyrics it don t mind me any mo dn o t go under the ladder cause of the paint not for any other reasons not for any other bleeding drips just for the sake of hearing me flee the scene the whole fiend excludes me it alludes me it allusions me to figger than i m the one without a trigger i m the one with the hatchet and i m standing too close to make my judgement ths this judgement make smemmm makes me retrad reacted teared and i feel unfolded so many corndercon con corners that maek me dizzy it maeks you dezzy gezzy puddon dreams i love dreams the song lifts my ears to a higher a highair it s beautiful it s all music fto fto me tTtToOoO me why don t they just give up on me cause they wuv me cuz dey du dud int matteir i feel lost i m goign to take a nap they re starting to confuse me the wednesday before chirstmas vaca 94 94 happy vacation all Eeyore pulse